When You Find Out He Is Married: Bad Date Story

Welcome, loves, to another episode of Bad Dates. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed as hard as I have through these bad date stories. Man, there are some doozies out there from the Hippy to Mr. Crab Dip to the Blind Date with the guy’s sister. In this blog, we’ll look at a story entitled, “When You Find Out He Is Married.”

*Names have been altered… so you don’t know who I’m talking about. 😉

Bad Date Story

This bad date story begins with Cathy (not her real name). Cathy lived in a city and was big into the club scene back in the day. Once when she spent the evening boogieing at a club, a man hit the dance floor when a Rage Against the Machine (not the band’s real name either) song started playing. To summarize, Cathy was intrigued by the cute guy who loved her favorite band!

After dancing, they started talking, and she felt a genuine connection during their conversation. He mentioned he was a psychiatrist. A doctor, she thought and amazed at her luck. During the course of their conversation, Mr. Psych said he wanted to take her out. Subsequently, she floated home on cloud nine with her feet barely touching the sidewalk.

Though this occurred “back in the day,” Facebook still existed, so Cathy trolled to find out more. Undoubtedly, Cathy (like me and many others snoops) found it interesting to check out someone’s pictures and posts…to make sure they were normal and not crazy (there are lots of crazies out there, folks). And, there on his Facebook page, she saw he was…

Married.

Plain as day on his profile were pictures of his wife and posts which mentioned her. Cathy’s face reddened as her blood started to boil. After that, she clicked a few more posts, teeth gritted with her mouth in a tight grimace. Unbelievable!

Hence, she picked up the phone and called him, ready to light him up. The absolute nerve of people! When Mr. Psych answered the phone, Cathy’s tirade ensued. She voiced her findings and hoped they stung. “What would your wife think of you if she knew this?”

However, Mr. Psych didn’t miss a beat. “Cathy, my wife was there the night I met you.”

Crickets on Cathy’s end.

“Her name is Tanya. We have a poly-amorous marriage.”

“You’re a swinger?” Cathy sat dumbfounded.

“We don’t call it ‘swingers.’ I am married and like to date. She agrees to it.” Apparently, the couple waited for sex until marriage but then afterward felt the need to sow their wild oats (holy flip-flop there). He went on to share more about his wife, how she was a nanny, and they didn’t have any children.

“I’m trying to date you and keep a marriage.”

Cathy, desiring an actual one-on-one relationship, respectfully declined.

Of note, Cathy and Mr. Psych are still Facebook friends.

When You Find Out He Is Married

A few things here…

Firstly, maybe poly-amorous marriage (or whatever) is your thing. No judgment. What makes this a bad date story is that Cathy wasn’t privy to that information up front. She became excited about the prospect of meeting a solid guy with a good career who shared similar interests. Truth be told… I feel like the other shoe always drops in the dating scene these days.

Secondly, it seems weird to think that during every laugh and smile Cathy exhibited to Mr. Psych when they met… his wife watched. That makes my skin crawl. I imagine her sipping her drink, watching them over the top edge of her glass, seeing her husband flirt and get the number of another woman. *Shiver*

Lastly, (and I may get flack for this) but it pays to do your research. People are not always who they portray themselves to be (like the hippy), and it’s in your best interest to find out if he is married. Let your fingers do the walking, people, and make your google assistant work for you. Who knows when he would have really told her about his marriage; she may have been a lot more invested.

And, double lastly (if there is such a thing), I want a whole man, unencumbered, all to myself. Truth be told, I don’t really share well.

Conversely, these stories (like Crab Dip) make me want to wall myself off and hang out with Larry. At least, I already know all his secrets: he likes food, morning petting, and making out with a brown, furry blanket (maybe Larry is poly-amorous???).

Love, K.

Author, Ten Iron Principles