I’m back with another Singles Series! I have to admit I struggle a bit telling my dating stories because I try to be factual. However, sometimes I date people I know (you can see how this MAY be awkward). Ergo, this series is about OTHER people’s bad first date stories.*
*The names have been changed to protect the innocent and the ridiculous.
The Hippy
Our story features Mandy (again, not her real name) who is a lovely single gal living in an urban city who ventured into the fine world of online dating. She chatted over an app with a “hippy-ish” guy. In an effort to branch out (hippies aren’t her type, but it’s easy to rule good people out while online dating), Mandy agreed to meet this potential hero at the Farmer’s market one weekend morning.
So far so good, right?
The wheels slowly start to come off, however.
First, Mr. Hippy showed up a half-hour late, which is totally fine if you’re a trauma surgeon or Superman. But, ordinarily, being that late on a first date demonstrates apathy. In his defense, he preferred eco-friendly travel and the bus was running late.
Mandy spent her time waiting and drinking an entire iced-coffee. Hippy Guy arrived flustered and started in with complaints of “it’s too hot” and “I don’t want to walk around,” which I get. Not everyone is like me and relishes physical activity. But, he did agree to meet at the Farmer’s Market, and it is relatively easy to check the weather (I’m just sayin’).
Interestingly, he wore a knit hat…in the summer…while complaining about how hot it is.
Anyway, let’s carry on…
Unfortunately, Mandy hadn’t thought of a potential back-up plan (Is this what dating boils down to? Women arranging dates and back up plans and men showing up late?). Instead of the market, they headed toward an eclectic record shop.
On the way, Mr. Hippy cussed out a couple of bikers riding by (“f*#@ you!”) and screamed at a homeless man. So, he’s not really putting his best foot forward (we hope). They ran into a convenience store because Mandy’s bladder was full from her iced coffee.
When she exited the bathroom, Hippy Guy was standing in an aisle of the store, possibly amongst the Kit-Kats and Skittles, knitting. Not kidding, using knitting needles and yarn stored in his trusty backpack.
“Whatcha doin’?” she asked (maybe incredulously… maybe amused)
“I’m knitting baseball caps.”
Okay. Well. Right. Of course. I guess he’s being resourceful with his time.
She said she needed to babysit a friend’s kid and hightailed it out of there.
Bad First Date Stories
Wow. Okay, a few things.
Firstly, one of Mandy’s observations was that Hippy Guy was not as he portrayed himself to be on the dating site. Public Service Announcement: other people will figure out who you are in the end, so you might as well be genuine. Plus, don’t you want someone to love you for who you really are?
Those who guard their lips preserve their lives, but those who speak rashly will come to ruin (Proverbs 13:3 NIV).
Secondly, (and this is for me only) I try to have the man plan the first date to see if he’s creative, invested, interesting, and motivated because there is no room for apathy in my life at the moment (or ever). I also desire a man who is a leader and not a follower (except with decorating…I’ll do the decorating, thank you very much).
Thirdly, let’s pray for the single people traversing this jungle. It’s a cold, cruel dating world out there, folks, full of harassers of the homeless and closet hobbyists.
Dear Lord, I pray for single people dating out there in today’s world. Please keep them safe and away from creeps. Amen.
Lastly, I was able to find a few sites on Etsy for knitted baseball caps, but they were for infants. So, from an entrepreneurial standpoint, it looks like he’s cornered the market on this one.
Stay tuned for more bad first date stories. AND, if you have a good one, please give me a shout!
Love, K.
Author, Ten Iron Principles
Can’t say that I was “on-line dating”, but I did meet my soulmate and current (read forever) wife on the computer. A blustery wintry Saturday, I ventured into a divorced chat room on America On-Line (AOL), which was a customer my company supported. Among the “ex-bashing”–yes, am pretty sure that’s a real sport as there were some experts there–was someone with a moniker of GetNHappi. While I didn’t agree with the woman’s opinion, I supported her right to speak her mind, yet asserted my own opinion, which was coincidentally contrary to her view on this subject. I let things lay where they were and continued amusing myself with the others’ comments until a private message notification appeared from a Ms. GetNHappi. Intrigued, I clicked and accepted the message. As I read these words, I knew this yet unknown person had the chutzpah to speak her mind. Her words to me? “You’re a Moron!” Well, twenty-three years later, I’m still being called a moron; smiling with each remark I deliver about how sexy or beautiful she is. And yes, my 74 year young wife is as sexy to me today as the day we met those many months after our first contact. Here’s praying you find someone as special and wonderful that God has already selected for you my friend. They’re out there, but sometimes God has to prepare both of you for when the moment is right… in His time. God’s blessings ma’am.
What a great story! I like your wife already!!! #chutzpah