Hey Blog family, at times I have difficulty dealing with frustration, and I’m going to blog my way through as a form of therapy. I run a big game (sometimes), but I’m far from perfect. I told a friend I curse at other drivers yesterday, and my friend was surprised (I’m not here to be perfect; I’m here to be truthful).
A quick Google search on frustration showed me that I’m on the right track. The first thing I saw was about how to recognize frustration. This I can do. Now, I’m talking about before the cursing and yelling start.
Location of Frustration
This is going to sound crazy, but I feel frustration first in my liver. I know, I know, that’s impossible, but the sensation I feel is located in the right upper quadrant of my abdomen. The area starts to tingle and then contracts. The spasm continues until I act.
I know people who prefer to avoid conflict, and I’ve met people who can have an entire conversation like nothing is wrong when everything is wrong. I’m built differently.
I need to address the situation immediately to feel relief.
However, sometimes emotions run high, and I don’t always make the best choices.
Whoever is patient has great understanding, but one who is quick-tempered displays folly (Proverbs 14:29 NIV).
Even the wisest man in all of history agrees with me!
Dealing with Frustration
I can recognize when frustration begins, AND I feel an overwhelming need for resolution which can be tricky in my emotional state.
So what to do?
Well, my tips for myself are:
- Pray. This is a great first step for everything always.
- Call a buddy. Maybe I need a frustration buddy, someone who can talk me off of the ledge and let me vent. The release of emotion may help prevent reactionary backlash.
- Journal. I’m a big fan of writing a letter to someone saying ALL I want to say and then shredding it. Sometimes just getting the words out there (I love words) is enough to water the fire down.
- Prepare. I know there are bad drivers out there. Before I pull out, maybe I need a quick mental refresher that other drivers may test me when I’m on the road. Maybe I can leave earlier to decrease my own stress level.
- Mandatory waiting period. I’ve tried to implement this before but found it difficult. Maybe if I journal and call a buddy, I’ll be able to hold out long enough to set the hammer down before initiating a discussion.
Life is a journey. It’s tough for all of us.
The key is growth and having the courage to try to make positive changes.
My mom can let you know if I make a dent in my struggle with frustration by the end of this blog series. 🙂 Next week we’ll talk about dealing with our frustration triggers!
Love,
K.
Author of Ten Iron Principles, Contributor in The Power to Make a Difference
Kelly, I struggle with frustration, too. I get frustrated with fellow drivers and slow check-out clerks, but I also get frustrated with myself when I forget where I’ve put my keys or when I forget to respond to an email or when I make a blunder with a recipe …. well, you get the idea. Sometimes, I feel like I’m harder on myself than others with my frustration. I like your list above, and I’ll try to implement it in my life, too! Thanks for sharing!
It’s nice to know that I’m not alone. I feel like I get tripped up and should know better!
Ouch, Kelly, I’ve been there, too (often). I did a lot of driving in my job and more than I’d like to admit, I said some ugly words when drivers did really dangerous things. Afterwards, I’d pray, ask God for forgiveness, and try to do better. I did improve, but occasionally, that frustration still sneaks out. Thanks for saying aloud what many of us feel and for sharing useful strategies to help us through those trying times.
I feel like the worst Christian when I’m in the car. The struggle is real for me. 🙂
I spend way too much time frustrated, especially at myself. I don’t always talk to myself as God would want me to. I try to say to God that I’m very frustrated with myself and ask Him to remove the frustration and replace it with the choice to be better. I still fail but He’s a patient God!
I know I struggle with this as well. I’m so thankful He’s patient!
Your honesty and practical tips made this post really valuable. Thank you for these insights.
Thank you! I’m trying to deal with the issue of frustration myself!
These are great tips on how to deal with frustration! I love that your state prayer, I agree!!
Thanks! I have to pull God into the mix because I need lots of help!! 🙂
Good tips. Anxiety frustration can precede, accompany, or follow an episode of nervousness, anxiety, fear, and elevated stress, or occur ‘out of the blue’ and for no apparent reason. … Stress, including anxiety-caused stress, can make normal day-to-day challenges seem more difficult, taxing, and frustrating.
I completely agree. Anxiety plays a huge role because it’s set us on edge before anything else has even happened.
I love that you start by recognizing frustration. Sometimes we get this mixed feelings and have no idea what they are. Great post. Thanks for sharing.
I’m doing well with this step albeit sometimes a little late with the recognition at times (ie, after I’ve already opened my mouth).
These are excellent tips to prevent the downward cycle that can begin when frustration gets the best of us. I am going to save this post because it will be needed!
I get caught in that downward cycle all too frequently. But, I feel things are slowly improving as I continue to write on this topic.
Great tips, I usually take a walk, drink a cup of tea and read something positive. That always helps.
I just bought some mint tea today! I’ll try that next time!
I think its great that you are going to blog through your frustrations. Frustration, stress and patience are something that I often struggle with as well, so you are not alone.
Thanks! Sometimes it seems like everyone else has it all together!
These are great tips to release your frustration. I love that you put prayer first. Praying and asking God to calm me almost always helps me. If I’m still feeling frustrated, like you I’ll write about it or journal it. Having healthy ways to release frustration is good for everyone.
I’m more aware of my frustrations after writing this blog series, but I’m still using my own steps to let things go!
I feel like I go through a lot of constant frustrations. Often just repeating myself all the time.. do your homework.. reply to my e-mails.. it definitely gets to me. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Daily life can definitely weigh us down at times.
great tips you got here! having a journal really works for me!
Yes! Getting our emotions out there is therapeutic!
I so relate to this post. I do recognize when I get frustrated as well. I use to react quickly and got into a lot of trouble for it. I love the tips you give, #2 & #5 I do now. But I will be adding #1. I also get up and walk with my favorite music, in which I sing or dance.
I like the dancing option! Sometimes I run to work off the excess energy.
I’ve tried number 3 a few times and found it super helpful. Need to bring that back into my life. Thanks for sharing!
Writing things down keeps me from saying things some times, which can be helpful in the heat of the moment.
In my own experience, problems are less heavy when you talk about them. I also believe in the power of praying. I don’t like conflict but sometimes it’s necessary to solve a situation.
I, too, like to share. I feel discussing a problem releases some of the tension.
We all have different ways to battle frustrations. When I’m frustrated either I write, I watch movies or do what Scarlet O’Hara’s style – not think about it, because tomorrow is another day 😀
I think sleeping it off is a great way to calm down!
Ugh- I get frustrated too! When I get very very frustrated, I go shout in pillow. It helps me so much! I will try your tips as well.
That’s a great idea! I live in an apartment building so screaming would likely cause other problems! 😉
I definitely sympathize with your frustration. It can make for a pretty horrific week. I do believe in prayer though and getting yourself centered through prayer.
Yes, God is the only way I can hope to be more patient.
Prayer is the key and only way because it worked for me. I am proud of you. I have been in a deep frustrating situation for a long time but gradually I began to work on my self and inner peace. I found peace praying. I pray you find peace, blessing and joy amen.
Thank you so much!!! This is a struggle for me, and I’m trying to grow with God!
In time you will, just read your bible, join good sincere, kind and loving christian family. You should be fine. I will remember you in my prayers too.
Thank you!!!
hugs xoxo
I agree with praying and talking with somebody. I did that. I am frustrated with my mother’s narcissism. But she’s still narcissistic so I have to keep putting up with that everyday.
That’s a difficult one. Maybe setting a few boundaries will help, so she can still be who she is but you have some protected space.
It is very deep post. I love it because this is exactly what i needed right now thank you.
I’m strong in the ways I am strong, and I’m weak in the ways I am weak. The key is to work to be better. Such truth and relatability in those words..what are you struggling with btw? Anything with which us blogging fam can help you 🙂
I’m struggling with small frustrations…wasting time and energy on things that don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. Once I lose my temper, it takes a bit of time to regroup. I’m trying to recognize annoyances earlier and then redirect my attention before anything happens.
this blog came at the right time, been having a bit of a tough week. Thanks for the support
I’m sorry it’s been rough. Let me know if there is anything I can do to help! (just said a prayer for you!)
Prayer is the best first step fir everything always! Needs a frame -sticky note – on a refrigerator- always kept in front of us. Thank you!
Thank you! I have to remind myself of this.